Sunday, July 14, 2013

TARZAN!!!...and Other Mini-Adventures From One Trip

Hey Mutineers!

Gross.
Grab some Fruity Pebbles, waffles, eggs, bacon, or whatever you have for breakfast, and prepare to read one of my many personal stories from one of my trips to the land that is Disney! This story happened 11 years ago when my mom, dad, and brothers went to Disneyland for two days and Jake and I had a large time! It was a time full of shenanigans, 12th graders, and a Tarzan experience which may or may not have left the Tarzan actor scarred for life. So, let’s get down to the nitty gritty, shall we?

So as I said, this happened 11 years ago. California Adventure wasn't very adventurous, and the Maliboomer still stood at 180 feet, and the puke shields made us both laugh. By the way, those weren't puke shields…they just kept the scream levels to a minimum. Jake and I decided to ditch our brother Josh, due to the fact that his future ex-wife was as annoying as a never ending car alarm, and twice as stupid. So we ventured out, we two, to explore the land that is Disney for the umpteenth time.

What really struck me on that trip was, no matter how old you get (I was 20 at the time) Disneyland still possessed that same magical feeling. That right there was something worth noting. You don’t have to be a kid to enjoy Disney! Jake and I did the usual: tried to hit all of the rides as fast as we could. It was working great! We did California Adventure in just two hours, but remember, there was only like four rides there at the time… Things were going great, the day was flying by. By noon we were already in Disneyland. We had some corn dogs, churros, and of course, the Dole Whip Floats. The day was epic, and we were bloated. We strolled over to Indiana Jones and got in line. Whilst we were in line, there were a few semi-good-looking girls looking at us. Okay, me. Maybe Jake. No, it was definitely me. We ignored them…okay, Jake ignored them. I'm pretty sure he thought girls still had cooties. I may have shot them a smile, but that was it. We continued our day.

This is where free pizza happens.
Meanwhile, that night at the Paradise Pier Hotel, Jake and I were wondering the halls when we heard “It’s the two guys from the park!” We turned around and those same girls happened to be staying at the same resort as us. They invited us up for pizza, and of course, you don’t say "no" to free pizza. So we did what any gentleman would do in that situation. We went upstairs, confirmed that the girls and all of their friends were retarded, and ate ALL of their pizza, wiped our chins with wet-naps, and left. We were in and out in less than 15 minutes, bellies full with free delectable pizza!

The next day my brother and I were at it again. The sun came up, we had some good eats for breakfast, and then hit the parks again! Things were going great, we hit all of the same rides, and then, while we were at Disneyland, a parade decided to break out right out of nowhere! We were currently residing in the Land of Fantasy, and I wanted to go on Alice in Wonderland, which is a Disney Gem all in itself. While we were enjoying our ride, we could hear the parade going by, and then when we burst through the doors of the ride, on top of the cement leaves and bridge, the site that we saw was nothing less than epic. Right in front of us, at eye level, was Tarzan, riding on a huge fake elephant, and I lost it.

Real easy to creep this guy out...
“TARZAN!....HEY TARZAN!” He didn't look yet. So I kept yelling at the top of my lungs, then finally, he looked up, our eyes met, and Jake and I just smiled and waved. We waved frantically. Tarzan gave us an awkward smirk, and an even more awkward wave, and we laughed like two kids who just watched their first Loony Toons cartoon! Tarzan was flabbergasted. Why were these two guys yelling at him? I myself still don’t know why I did it, but I do know that it was funny. That experience alone has given my brother and me tons of hardy laughter over the years. I would just like to say thank you Tarzan, for being on a fake elephant, and waving awkwardly at two guys side by side on a caterpillar. Disney memories are fantastic!