Thursday, March 7, 2013

The Autopia That Will Never Be.



Autopia!
I'm going to have a seat in my armchair imagineering, uh, armchair and I am going to tell you what I want to happen in the Autopia.  But first Disney needs to strike a deal with Nintendo to use some of their stuff.  I'll wait... Well? Oh yeah, this is my armchair, I don't have to wait. So let us pretend it's done. You. Yes, you.  Start pretending or so help me....  Where was I?
I think that Autopia needs to be transformed into a live action Mario Kart track!  How flippin' cool would that shit be?  Shooting turtle shells at people, invincibility stars, banana peels and a rainbow road tunnel!
You can't tell me this wouldn't be awesome.

It could happen easy enough. The items and all the actions that the cars need to complete are handled by the ride's computer.  Now how do we race, you ask? Welllllll.......  Sorry, keyboard stuck. Instead of two side by side loading lanes, the cars need to be at least five abreast, then that group goes. And so on.

Now to make it seem real-ish, the cars need personality and handling characteristics just like in the game.  If you've played Mario Kart, you will understand. Also, the tracks need to somehow criss-cross (no not the 90's hip hop band) maybe using a virtual track ala Tokyo's Pooh Bear Ride. I think it could kick some major ass and would be fun.  Hmmm... I guess since Disney has Wreck-It Ralph, they can use that Sugar Rush race game as a basis....


To save on licensing fees, I suppose Disney could just use their own similar franchise.