Sunday, November 4, 2012

Mutineer Blogcast #2: Banter Tracks

Josh:  So. Big news! Disney now owns LucasFilms!  Great things ARE coming and great things may be coming as well. Theme park additions anyone?  
I would really like to see an expanded Star Wars area in Disney's Hollywood Studios.  Expanded to the point of a whole Star Wars "land" or better yet a LucasFilms land including Indiana Jones in it. But what attractions would go there?  

Jake: You think this whole purchase was for Star Wars? I think we're all missing the big picture here. First, Disney buys Marvel, and then buys LucasFilm. What is the one things those two companies have in common? Howard the Duck.

Josh:  Here I am brain the size of a planet and you bring up Howard the Duck?  You call that job satisfaction?  Cause I don't...

Jake: You're right. Let's get back to this Star Wars thing. At Hollywood Studios, the Indiana Jones stunt show and Star Tours are already close enough together that combining them into a full-fledged LucasLand wouldn't be very hard at all. There's a quick service eatery between them that could easily be rethemed. Preferably as the Mos Eisley cantina. I want that cantina band! I also want park guests getting their arms severed, just for authenticity.

Josh: Ah food!  Been waiting to hit on this. They definitely need the cantina, band and all. However, it should been split in half with Marian's Sherpa bar. Complete with Lego nazi invasions and Indiana Jones. I think that the cantina half could be quick serve with the Sherpa bar being a sit down area. They could seriously make a sick area for both of those franchises and in my mind they are about half way there. But what else could hey add besides food joints?

Jake: Well I think an obvious choice would be the ride Florida fans have been clamoring for since 1995, and that's the Indiana Jones Adventure from Disneyland. But they'll have to change it up since Dinosaur at Animal Kingdom already uses the same exact track layout. Or they could use the Test Track system for some sort of pod racing or speeder bike ride. Unfortunately both of those already show up in Star Tours. Oh!! Demolish the Honey I Shrunk the Kids play area and use that real estate to make something completely unrelated, and then make a Dagobah swamp Jedi training play area!

Josh:  I'm sure someone will wish to throw me in the sarlacc pit for this, but... Axe Honey I shrunk the Kids and install an Ewok village play area!  That would be fun. Creepy yet cute midget teddy bears that kill nazis!

Jake: I like it, but the Ewok village is already the queue for Star Tours. What about a classic dark ride? Maybe a spook house-style one like Snow White's Scary Adventures. But this one would be the Wampa cave, or Jabba's palace! I think I'm on to something here...

Josh:  Oh man!  There is some sick potential!  A dark ride skimming all the films narrated by Kevin Smith?  He likes Star Wars and he's written for marvel...  Eh maybe. Anyhow, I see where you are going with this. But I wanna talk about Indy!  I don't think WDW needs a carbon copy of Indiana Jones and the temple of the forbidden Carnotaur.  What it needs is something more thrilling than a skeleton wearing a fedora stuffed in a refrigerator. They need a ride. Maybe the one from Paris? Or... Maybe something completely original???

Jake: I like where your head's at with the Indiana Jones roller coaster, because if there's something that wouldn't hurt Hollywood Studios at all is another roller coaster. Especially on the opposite end of the park as Rock n' Roller Coaster and Tower of Terror. Having the two biggest thrill rides right next to each other really flares my herpes. We need something big in the new LucasLand to disperse the crowds more evenly. Because no one rushes to Lights, Motors, Action or the Backlot Tour at rope drop.

Josh:  Wow.  I didn't even look that far ahead... I guess all I have to add to this is this: Cloudy. The future is. Also, that for me, there is a New Hope at Disney's Hollywood Studios.

Jake: Maybe they can make a Hoth Ice Tunnel of Love where you kiss your sister.... What?
Come on, guys! Come back!

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